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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22825156">drowning (in your love)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sprinkleofsunshine/pseuds/sprinkleofsunshine'>sprinkleofsunshine</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>songfics [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Awkwardness, Cute, Fluff, Hickeys, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, No Smut, Not Beta Read, Not Canon Compliant, Pining Michael Mell, Practice Kissing, Requested, Shy Jeremy Heere</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 07:35:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,394</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22825156</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sprinkleofsunshine/pseuds/sprinkleofsunshine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>drowning. ever since he'd first noticed his feelings for jeremy, that's what michael had equated the feeling to. falling helplessly, unable to breathe, unable to pull yourself away. it was terrifying. and yet, as they kissed now, he wished it would never end.</em>
</p><p>***<br/>(in which jeremy enlists the help of his friend for some... practice)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jeremy Heere/Michael Mell</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>songfics [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1548631</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>105</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>drowning (in your love)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/COCKSUCKER78/gifts">COCKSUCKER78</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>[request by Cats_And_Potatoes: "Oooooh. If you could do a Jeremy/Michael fic with like, practice kissing, that would be cool."]</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>it shouldn't have been weird.</p><p>they'd talked about it before. they told each other everything. they both knew it; while michael had some semblance of experience (ie. a week-long relationship with toby daniels in middle school and a dare at a party he wasn't technically invited to, but those hardly counted), jeremy remained a kiss-virgin.</p><p>it wasn't a big deal at first. but, as senior year approached, jeremy's confidence depleted. he was embarrassed, to say the least. <em>("it's humiliating," he'd told michael one night, anxious and weary. "we're gonna go to prom and i'll be the only one there that's never kissed anyone. ever. and everyone knows it! that's fucking pathetic!") </em></p><p>and, if he was being honest, michael was tired of it. he loved his friend, more than anything, and it killed him to see him sad. </p><p>
  <em>(he'd known about his feelings for jeremy for a couple years now. and, as much as he hated to admit it, a selfish part of him was glad jeremy had yet to kiss anyone. part of him wanted that experience for himself. he'd never tell him that, though.)</em>
</p><p>he was desperate, he'd said. he'd do anything, he'd said.</p><p>when michael finally offered to help, though...</p><p>"you want to do <em>what?"</em></p><p>michael laughed. "it's not that big of a deal, jere."</p><p>"isn't it?" across from him, jeremy had practically folded in on himself. he was curled into the corner of the sofa, knees tucked up to his chest, hands cupping the flushed redness of his face. an adorable pout formed on his lips, and michael wanted to die instantly.</p><p>"i didn't think it would bother you this much," michael tried again, voice softer. "i just thought, y'know, you might want to."</p><p>jeremy shifted in his seat, bringing his chin to rest on one of his knees. "when i said i wanted to kiss someone, i didn't expect you to volunteer!"</p><p>"is it really so surprising?"</p><p>"yes!"</p><p>"well, you've talked about wanting to kiss someone so many times now, it almost just seemed like a given-"</p><p>"michael, it wasn't an open invitation!"</p><p>michael shuffled forward a bit, ruffling jeremy's hair. "you can say no. it's okay."</p><p>"it's..." jeremy buried his head in his arms, giggling shyly to himself. "it's <em>weird."</em></p><p>"why is it weird?"</p><p>"you- you're my best friend! i can't kiss you!"</p><p>"technically speaking..."</p><p>"shut up!" jeremy squealed, embarrassed. he covered his face, sighing into his hands. michael laughed.</p><p>"it wouldn't be weird. we're already close, arguably more so than average." he twirled an unruly twist of hair around his finger. "you don't have to. i mean that. it was just an idea. we can forget about it, okay?"</p><p>after a beat of silence, he mumbled something, words muffled.</p><p>michael chuckled. "can't hear you, buddy."</p><p>"i..." jeremy looked up, eyes wide. "i'll do it. i think... i think i want to."</p><p>michael resisted every urge to scream.</p><p>he cleared his throat, feigning confidence. "oh. okay. cool. let's do it, then."</p><p>"okay..." jeremy shifted on the sofa, settling on his knees, facing michael. he reached forward, putting a hesitant hand on michael's shoulder before pulling it away. "how should i...?"</p><p>reaching a hand down, michael traced a finger over jeremy's. "just... do what feels natural. i'll help you out."</p><p>jeremy lifted his hand, settling it on michael's shoulder again. he curled his fingers a bit, scratching lightly at the fabric of michael's hoodie, before flattening his palm. </p><p>"alright."</p><p>"you ready?"</p><p>he looked down.</p><p>"hey, hey-" michael tapped a finger under jeremy's chin, lifting his head so their eyes met again. "you good?"</p><p>jeremy chuckled breathlessly, a deep blush settling on his face. "yeah- yeah, m'good."</p><p>michael smiled. "let's just do this, okay?" he whispered. "just this once. if you hate it, we can just forget it ever happened, and i promise to never ever kiss you again."</p><p>"this won't... mess us up, or anything?"</p><p>"of course not. me and you, buddy. 'til the end of time."</p><p>"end of time." jeremy let his eyes shut slowly, and michael took the moment to admire the freckled patches of rose-stained skin on his cheeks and nose. he pressed a kiss to jeremy's nose, ever-so-soft, before tilting his head up with his fingers and letting their lips meet.</p><p>jeremy's lips were rough against michael's, chapped and worried and bitten (a nervous habit, no doubt). he tasted vaguely like the strawberry soda he'd been drinking earlier. michael didn't care.</p><p>a cold hand moved to cup michael's face, unsteady fingers finding their way through his hair. he leaned into the touch, biting back a smile and choosing instead to nip at jeremy's bottom lip. jeremy shuddered, a weak sigh breaking the veil of silence around them.</p><p>michael pulled back. jeremy was hesitant with his movements, blinking glossy eyes after a moment. he seemed dazed.</p><p>"you okay, jere?"</p><p>"i-i..." he blinked again, shook his head, cleared his throat. "i want..."</p><p>jeremy forced his body forward too quickly, stumbling into michael. giggling at the soft "ow" michael mumbled as his back his the armrest. he draped his arms over michael's shoulders, pulling him in and kissing him hard.</p><p>there was no hesitance now, no restraint. michael's hands found jeremy's hips, fingertips teasing at the exposed strip of skin just above his waistband. jeremy let out a soft whimper, pushing his hands under michael's shirt, tracing unintelligible patterns into the warmth of his chest. michael arched up into the touch.</p><p>it felt like drowning, to michael. drowning, but not dying. ever since he'd first noticed his feelings for jeremy, that's what he'd equated the feeling to. falling helplessly, unable to breathe, unable to pull yourself away. it was terrifying. and yet, as they kissed now, he wished it would never end.</p><p>limbs tangled, hands roaming, lips locked- the two stayed like that, kissing contently, losing track of time. they kissed until their lungs tightened with the need to breathe, until their arms ached from pulling each other closer, until the strawberry soda lingering on jeremy's lips had long since faded away.</p><p>michael tilted his head back, nose grazing jeremy's lightly. he peppered light kisses on the other's cheek, trailing down his jawline and under his chin, nipping at the skin lightly. a quiet whimper escaped jeremy's lips, now pressed together tightly. michael found himself smiling, alternating kisses and small bites on his neck, until rosy marks threatened to form.</p><p>eventually, jeremy's hands found their way to michael's chest, pushing himself away. "stop, stop."</p><p>michael propped himself up on his elbows, anxiety flooding his mind. "you okay? what's wrong?"</p><p>"no, it's- i just-" he cut himself off, laughing breathlessly. his head dropped forward, forehead pressing against michael's. "too much."</p><p>"oh." michael flushed. "i'm sorry."</p><p>"no, no, it's okay! you're just, you're... really, <em>really</em> good at that."</p><p>he smirked at that, relieved instantly. "s'that so?"</p><p>"mhm," jeremy sighed. he shifted, moving so his body was pressed snugly between michael's body and the sofa. he rested his head on michael's chest, snuggling close. strong arms wrapped around his waist, hugging him close.</p><p>this, this was normal. michael could breathe now. </p><p>
  <em>(part of him wished he couldn't.)</em>
</p><p>"that was..." jeremy hid his face in michael's neck. "that was good."</p><p>"yeah?" michael tilted his head, pressing a soft kiss in jeremy's hair.</p><p>"yeah."</p><p>"good."</p><p>jeremy looked up, his eyes meeting michael's. michael noticed a shimmer in his friend's beautiful blue irises, a flash that was gone before he could place what it was.</p><p>and suddenly, they were both laughing.</p><p>laughing hysterically, in fact. jeremy knocked his head against michael's shoulder, body shaking with his uncontrollable giggles.</p><p>"i can't-" he paused, rubbing his eyes, "i can't <em>believe</em> we just did that!"</p><p>"i know!" michael pulled him closer, giggling. </p><p>"and i thought we were close before!"</p><p>"right? at least now we can never doubt our friendship."</p><p>"exactly!" he shook his head, sighing against michael's chest as their laughter died down. </p><p>quiet settled around them; a comfortable and welcome silence that wrapped around them, holding them secure in this beautifully warm moment. michael's hand rested on the small of jeremy's back, drawing ambiguous figures over the soft cotton of his shirt. his eyes fell shut, and he embraced the moment that was sure to end too quickly.</p><p>pushing his worries to the back of his mind, michael sighed.</p><p>"y'know, i wouldn't mind doing that again sometime."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>(inspired by backstreet boys' <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZXHBgjQjNM">"drowning"</a>)</p><p>this was so much fun to write!! it's a cliche trope, but who doesn't love writing a little cliche sometimes?</p><p>sorry for the long wait- between balancing mental and physical health struggles, plus school/work, i've been really busy. however, because of recent events, most (if not all, by the time this is posted) of the semester has been cancelled, so i suddenly have a bit of free time. </p><p>(edit: i'm working on a couple other requests at the moment. i had posted a "requests" fic for people to comment on, but unfortunately had to take it down, so for the time being, i am no longer taking requests. i apologize for any inconvenience.)</p><p>i hope you all are staying safe and taking care of yourselves. we'll get through this. one day at a time.</p><p>~sprinkle</p><p>***</p><p>comments &amp; kudos are appreciated!! lots of love!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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